Thursday, March 21, 2013


I'm constantly surprised by the things I find myself discussing with The Deputy. Most people call it "compromising". LEO wives call it "negotiating".

Our newest negotiation was over bedtime. That's right. Like a conversation you'd have with your parents in junior high. Only, instead of someone begging to stay up an extra hour, I was trying to convince The Deputy to go to bed earlier.

The conversation went something like this:

Me: "I wish you would come to bed earlier, I hate going to bed alone and then waiting for you to come upstairs..."
The Deputy: "I can't go to sleep that early!" (by early, he means 9:30. I'm old like that)
Me: "But I have to get up at 6:30 every morning, I can't stay up that late!" (By late, I mean at least midnight. The Deputy is a night owl in every sense of the word)
The Deputy: Blank stare.
Me: "If I go to bed 15 nights out of the month alone without complaining (this coming from the girl who actually counted), you should be able to make the sacrifice and go to bed early the other nights..."

That's right, I threw out the word 'sacrifice'. I think it's a great marriage word, I plan on using it for the next forty years.

To cut to the chase, we both came out alive.

I'll continue to sleep alone half of the month (his work nights) and he'll give in and go to bed at a time I'm sure feels like the middle of the afternoon to him the other half. And then I'll continue to roll over to his side of the bed, stick my feet in between his calves and say, "Are my feet cold?!" just to feel him jump, steal all the covers, ask him to be the Big Spoon and fall into a deep sleep by 10:00 pm while he lays awake with my hair in his face, his arm going numb, thinking about how magical and wonderful marriage is! (I can't say for sure that's what he's doing because, well, I never stay up long enough to find out....)

(Photo courtesy of


  1. I have the same issue, but it's hard for a cop to adjust his sleep on his nights off. In fact it's 5:19pm, my cop is sleeping and I'm up beginning to make dinner, he will get up at 7pm, and then won't want to come to bed at 10pm with me. Half the nights he works nights and half days so no matter what it seems like if he's home he's sleeping opposite times of me.

  2. haha this is a constant struggle with any LEO relationship! My man always wants to go to bed early and get up early, whereas I'm a night owl most times and LOVE to stay in bed in the mornings.
    I can't wait to find out what his actual shifts will be after the academy is over *sarcasm* haha. I guess that's what we get for picking LEO and nurse for careers. lol